"Some people call this genderqueer, genderfluid, bigender, whatever you want! No, labels don’t matter. I would recommend exploring tumblr more. There are tons of tumblrs directed to those that identify as genderqueer, androgynous, genderfluid, bigender, no gender, third gender, so on so forth, and you may find a label that you feel best defines you after a little more exploration."
I don't know~
Recently I've been trying to... find a label for myself. I didn't really have to, before I met people in the community, and they ask what do I identify as, and I'm like, "I'm the Q in LGBTQ?" haha I either say "questioning" or "queer". Most recently I've said questioning, because that's the easiest answer. Or rather, it's the first thing that comes into my head. xD
But lately I've been feeling that "questioning" is a rather immature term to use, is it not? It mostly applies to adolescents, and you know, the gay people I know aren't questioning, they KNOW exactly who they are attracted to. But I don't know. When I first encountered this, I was really doubtful, and thought it was a Thing that I should get solved. I should find out what I identify as, asap. Just so I can have a straight answer to people to ask, and there won't be awkward silences.
Really I'm okay with people asking; it is practically a getting-to-know-you prerequisite now. I'm just not very used to it because not everyone, upon introducing themselves, asks about one's sexual or gender orientation.
haha and on twitter I say I'm "Out", but the strange thing is that I'm not Out to my family (and not planning to do so anytime soon) and of course I'm not Out to my school network, my potential employers, etc. because:
1) I don't think my sexuality has anything to do with my employability or my academic ability (or lack thereof).
2) If I outed myself in singapore, I'd have a really tough time trying to find someone who would hire me.
I'm out to, well, the people online-- which is everybody really, but I am safely cloaked in anonymity. I'm also out enough that I can meet people in the community, and I'm also so fortunate that I can talk about this to my counselor if I ever need to, without worrying about her reacting negatively. This is a privilege that people in the army don't get, though. In singapore it's compulsory for all male citizens to undergo National Service once they turn 18. I'm not sure if it's DADT, but word on the street is that you get a lower PES (Physical Employment Status) if you say at the medical checkup that you're gay. I've also heard that if you declare that you have a mental illness, eg depression, they'll put that on your report and mess up your chances of getting into a good university after serving NS. The second rumour, to be honest, sounds more fluff than truth, but I heard it from someone who knows someone who works in the military. psssh the way I describe my source ~really~ adds to the validity of the rumour, huh? xD
Anyway, regarding the PES downgrading-- it's been corroborated by multiple sources, so it's more likely to be true. The reason why I have to get this information from friends and hearsay is because that there isn't an official word on it. Which basically means that they can lower your PES for any reason. To treat LGBTQs as second class citizens solely based on their sexual orientation is derogatory, at best. On the other hand, some welcome this grading, because a higher grading just means that more is expected of you during your time in NS. They'd prefer to do less physically challenging duties during their 2 years in NS, the easier the better, since NS is compulsory. If you get a low enough grading, you are eligible for clerical work. What I've learnt is that the distinctions aren't so clear, though-- there are multiple bands, from A- F, and within the grades there are subsections, eg: B1L1, B1L2, C9 and so forth.
I know someone who doesn't have a PES A grade, and he gets to stay indoors most of the time, not have to "bang" during drill, watch war movies. There are some leadership roles required of him, and a certain discipline instilled, and he still has to report every day to camp. Or work, since NS men are paid during their service.