You know when I first read American Gods at the beginning of sec 2, [I remember not having enough time to read ! oh dear what is this saying about my work ethic] I interpreted it as being slightly moralistic. I thought gaiman was trying to tell people not to forget about their gods, but it felt a bit weird to me at that time because I had read smoke and mirrors before that, and he didn't seem like the moralistic type.

At that time I didn't have much experience with Adult Fiction, so I must have read everything quite literally, like how you read Young Adult fantasy. I also remember taking a long time to read it, firstly because it was quite long, and partly because of the complex themes you need time to think about. Because anyone can plow through, say, GoF quite quickly, and it's probably longer than american gods, it doesn't really have the depth of american gods, so you can read and understand it quite quickly. (sorry, jkr!)

Though now I'm reading it for the second time [gaiman put it up for free; the link is on his website till the end of march], and even though I've mostly forgotten the details of what happens, I think I've got the big picture: about gaiman trying to illustrate the situation of how gods are represented (or misrepresented) in the present, and in the american context, where almost everyone is an immigrant. Immigrants brought their gods, religions and beliefs to america when they migrated there, but right now people see themselves sometimes as american first and their ethnicity second. For example, ethnic Chinese living in the states sometimes see themselves as "American-Chinese" and not Chinese, or chinese-american.

Personally right now I'm reading it with a more open mind than in sec 2, but it's like reading the book for the first time actually, because I rediscover things I missed out, such as the relation of mr nancy to anansi boys. I think this is also partly because I've read some of sandman, (which is um, quite graphic, haha hence graphic novel) so when I come across the sick bits I'm not like: " oooh fascinating!" but "what is the significance of this to plot/ themes/ characterisation?" HAHAHAHA I've been studying hedda gabler, okay.

let's end with a quotable philo quote: "All we have to believe with is our senses, the tools we use to perceive the world: our sight, our touch, our memory. If they lie to us, then nothing can be trusted. And even if we do not believe, then still we cannot travel in any other way than the road our senses show us; and we must walk that road to the end."

Was browsing people's wishlists on BookMooch, and I saw that many many people have neil gaiman or the sandman series on their wishlists! Is there hope for a future Con(vention)? Meaning like a comic con, what they have in the states, or orbital, the con that gaiman is guest-honouring RIGHT NOW over the easter weekend, at this very moment. Gosh I sound like a fangirl. But I AM a fangirl! :D Orbital is the British National Science Fiction Convention, also known as Eastercon because it's held over the easter holidays. They have very very cool programmes lined up from friday to monday, which include SLASH DISCUSSION! yay *hyperventilates* I mean where else do hordes of people gather legitimately to talk about slash??? It's adults only, though): I count as an adult. If adult = not a kid. I am fifteen! And mature enough to talk about slash without breaking into giggles, really. Grr it says adult programming means no under 18s. But won't they need a voice representing the sexually repressed youth of today? Won't it vary the discussion and give an alternate perspective?

And then they have this thing called Rope Bondage Workshops o_o for people like geri, and mich [not the 415 one] I suppose. xD I didn't know so many people were into these things to have special classes for them.

The con programme is so long that it fills up more than 10 pages. I want a con like that in our region! There are so many people in the uk who like SF to validate a con like this... what about the leisure reading scene in singapore? Other than nanowrimo, or random poetry slams, they hardly do anything to prove their existence. But it could be that I'm not in their circles so I don't really know what's going on, but the bottom line is: we should have a fantasy/SF/ or YA (young adult) con. One that is actually affordable for regional fangirls (and fanboys) to attend. Partly because lately I've read so much about cons on neil gaiman's and orson scott card's blogs: the terry prachett discworld one in Pheonix, Arizona, the pending YA con which wanted to invite Madeline L'engle as GOH, the comic con that maddy, (gaiman's daughter) got to go to >( and the list goes on. I think the closest things we have to a con in singapore are things like cosfest, but these only serve the people who read/watch animae/manga. Though if we had a really general con- like the comic con- there could be a masquerade, like in orbital, where people walk down a runway like a fashion show, and show off their costumes. We could even invite local writers as GOH, since what are the chances of, say, Jasper Fforde coming to singapore just for a con that hasn't established a reputation?

Though looking at the volunteer list for a con, I didn't realise that there were so many things to do in preparation: you have to book a venue/hotel, invite GOHs, get retailers in the Dealer's room (where they sell their stuff), get people to do lights/ logistics for things like the discos and masquerade, get the website and publicity up, plan the programme, print and pack guides for people attending the con, and people who keep track of people who sign up/ have to pay for a con ticket. So I suppose there are professional event management people who do this in singapore, but traditionally people not in the exco are volunteers, so it keeps costs down for attendees.

I'm in the library now, and somebody's listening/ watching to american idol outside really loudly. I don't know how xD but they are putting Michael John's cover of Eleanor Rigby on repeat, which is fine by me(: I'm kind of following AI now, even though I don't watch much tv (because my mum and sister are watching korean dramas on it) OH OH I KNOW HOW THEY [people who are playing outside the library] ARE DOING IT! You can buy the videos' songs on iTunes, and they're probably playing it on an ipod with speakers. Because I think I'm hearing past seasons too. The person right now has a really good voice, actually. Right, I digress. Anyway, I watch american idol on their website now, because iTunes sponsors it. I like it because you can watch them over and over again, with the judge's comments edited out. Though I watched in last night on star world at 12am, and kind of missed having a large screen to watch it on, but whatever. Gosh I sound so teen.

On another note, someone please remind me to write more book reviews now (after lit, bio and math I suppose) so that I might be able to win movie tickets from the cats people. Additionally. the people who are writing reviews now on sunday are reviewing YA stuff, which gets boring after a while. I mean it's the kind of YA that is terribly high school and um cliched. Jeez this is elitist. I mean I think I would deliberately write a SF review, or an Oliver Twist one, since I'm reading it now. Luna was passable the last time; maybe I should go with Boy Meets Boy by David Levithan because I really like his GLBT descriptions. They make me melt. I'll just submit all three and they can pick... or I can submit them every two weeks, so that they won't have to choose between all three and pick mine all the time. *is selfish*

Ah, look at all the lonely people.

note to self: look up danse macabre.

I haven't talked about ecamp, even though blogsurfing was illuminating. I'll just put a couple lines for posterity. I think ecamp was okay; though the sec3s could have prepared for things like station games and meals in advance so things would proceed more smoothly. Mmm what I have to say has been said, so there's not much point putting it here. We always stay back to talk after camp, and for this one we stayed back... until 10! (or later, for the sec3s) Quite frankly, the best part was the pizza. [Which we haven't paid for ><] The JC2 ma'ams helped a lot, though it's mostly up to us if we are going to commit and put things through. da da dum. I remember the last time we had a day camp was when I was in sec2, we sang the red cross song really loudly, and were really enthu after camp.

I think I'd like to take drugs. You know, probably in the near future.

Okay that sounded bad- because you know the 3 big things they tell you to stay away from: sex, drugs and alcohol. Oh dear. I think I'm becoming a delinquent. But it's mostly because of the Beatles (and Across the Universe)-- they took LSD (acid) and marijuana, among others. I don't think I seriously want to take drugs, just you know, try them a little. Gosh I think after people read this they will go whoa hang on what's nick doing? actually I wanted to try them more yesterday, when I slept for an hour the night before. (don't ask) And then when I didn't sleep and geeru started me off with "pink butterflies" and Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds, (first thing in the morning, lol) it made me feel a little... off of the present plane. Like I trancended to another place that is not this one but almost like it. Maybe I just felt very escapist and put off by the things that were happening on monday.

But the beatles took drugs openly! They're like one of the few celebrities who are not dissed for it. Look at lindsay lohan, for example. The media portrays her in a very bad light because she had to go to rehab. What about amy winehouse? "They wanna make me go to rehab, I said no, no, no." There's this big stigma about taking drugs, = obviously, I shouldn't take them. Maybe I shouldn't. I don't know, I just like toying with the idea, mainly because it spurred creative output. (Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds, I am the Walrus)

and then I was pretending to seriously take lsd;
me: If I wanted to get lsd, where would I find it?
geeru: on ebay?
me: what if it turns out to be washing powder?
I mean how can I comtemplate this seriously if I don't know how it looks like? So on wikipedia it says: In pure form it is colorless, odorless and mildly bitter. LSD is typically delivered orally, usually on a substrate such as absorbent blotter paper, a sugar cube, or gelatin. In its liquid form, it can be administered by intramuscular or intravenous injection. The threshold dosage level needed to cause a psychoactive effect on humans is of the order of 20 to 30 µg (micrograms). That's not a lot to have hallucinations. Haha I was just thinking that we always have someone having hallucinations during mass evac; they could be taking lsd! It's also known as acid-- John Lennon was on an acid trip when writing I am a Walrus. Ooh it says intelligence agencies were interested in lsd as a social engineering tool during the cold war. o.o It was popular in the hippie movement, where the drug supposedly helped with enlightenment and meditation, and known as a psychadelic drug. However, "The United Nations Convention on Psychotropic Substances (adopted in 1971) requires its parties to prohibit LSD. Hence, it is illegal in all parties to the convention, which includes the United States, Australia, and most of Europe" so it would be difficult to obtain.

Therefore. I think I'll just stick to coffee at the moment. Anyway, it won't be easy to get it because a) it's illegal b) I don't know people who have/produce it c) I don't have a credit card for it on ebay. This is also the reason why they make drug-related movies nc-16, because 15 year olds are still stupidly impressionable and easy to influence. (i.e. me)

Brainwave!
because, you know, Beatles songs are not easy to analyse-- you don't know if they wrote it when they were on LSD or if they really mean it, or both. Strawberry Fields Forever, taking it in the context of across the universe:


Let me take you down cause I'm going to strawberry fields
Nothing is real and nothing to get hung about
Strawberry fields forever
Living is easy with eyes closed
Misunderstanding all you see
It's getting hard to be someone but it all works out
It doesn't matter much to me

I was trying to understand what the Beatles meant, because the symbolism of strawberry fields does not relate at all to the rest of the lyrics. The way Jude pins the strawberries makes me thing of minefields and military formation (lol like FD) but if it means that, than why does he say "forever"? Then I thought and thought and thought. I think slowly, but because it's 3am! I have a brilliant brainwave. Jude is escapist! Like me! The speaker likes to not have to think about the war going on, in this case the vietnam war, because he thinks "living is easy with eyes closed" like "ignorance is bliss". But then the war is always nagging at the side, so he can't completely escape, and he is irritated at this. Because he knows that he isn't supposed to shut everything out and pretend that it isn't happening, as a kind of punishment for escaping, "misunderstanding is all you see".
When I think of closing your eyes and seeing misunderstanding, I think of the imagery of opening your eyes and gaining enlightenment. Or in this context Living with your eyes open is paying attention to what is happening, and because you look at all this destruction, you have a human moral calling to change things, and this might be the "enlightenment" bit. But when you change things, you become political and this forces you to pick sides and take a stand, and the speaker doesn't seem to want to take a stand, because fighting against the war may render you as eager to gain power as your political opponent.
The speaker might also find that it's "getting hard to be someone" because his conscience is telling him to go to something about the war. He finds it hard to be someone with principles and beliefs when escapism is refuting all the values you're supposed to have. He might also feel that he doesn't have value as a person, to be "someone" when he isn't doing anything for the war; he is just sitting and pretending things aren't as serious as they really are, or that nothing is happening, i.e. being useless.

*reminds self to talk more about symbolism and imagery of strawberry*

this is a song from across the universe, a movie musical made out of beatles songs(: the songs in it are all covers, but the songs in the movie are still very true to the original recordings. I haven't heard all the songs from the movie yet, but this one was used in one of the trailers, and it puts me in a very hippie romantic mood :D It made me want to run though the corridors with free abandon today and just sing! Though I didn't ): If you see the trailer, it might make you feel young and idealistic, and that anything can happen! It has the hope and lovey-ness of yellow submarine, and some of the artistic themes, but it's different! In a good way! Evan Rachel Wood is in it, and it kind of helps that Jim Sturgess- the male lead and the guy in this video- is cute. XD

( I know it was showing in singapore a while ago, but I've only recently stumbled on it, and coincidentally also on Idina Menzel [the original broadway elphaba] mooning in Rent- I didn't know she was in rent! She rocks there, by the way.)

Browse Inside this book Get this for your site

and go here:http://img89.imageshack.us/img89/8339/4db8fa6df104decb060a885nc0.gif

it's a hilary/obama banner with a sandman reference(:

So I went to jasper fforde's website, and I found out about the Fforde Fiesta! It's like a convention for fforde fans. And then there's a teen angst poetry competition, a thursday next and nursery crime knowledge quiz, a fancy dress parade (a little like cosplay), a dance, a karaoke prose reading competition, a murder mystery gala dinner, a guided bus tour of the nextian sights of swindon, and... you get the point. *swoons* I really want to go! Just that it's from 2nd may to 5th may, and school happens to be in the way. Just for fun, I planned an itinerary! (if I happened to be able to go)

Return trip from singapore to bristol on northwest: $1500USD [$2100SGD] (arriving on 2/5 and departing on 6/5)
Return trip from singapore to heathrow on qantas: $1600SGD
Return trip from singapore to bristol on lufthansa: $2400SGD (!)

I will take= QF5 and QF3601 [singapore-frankfurt-heathrow] and QF10 [heathrow-singapore]
From heathrow to swindon, you have to take a train from Paddington Railway Station, and to get there, you can either take the 15 min heathrow express (29pounds=$80.40SGD for a return ticket) or the underground (4pounds=$11.10SGDx2=$22.20). I'll probably take the underground, though this will take an hour or so; and I have to carry my stuff up and down platforms, which is a little tiresome. But you get to hear mind the gap! XD I'm such a sucker for these references.
from paddington to swindon by rail it's $17.50 pounds=$48.50SGD for a return ticket.

=so far, I can see a lot of breaks in my journey. it's like sg-heathrow-paddington-swindon- place of accomodation, and then back the same way. I like travelling on trains though; because I don't usually do that. For a more direct route, they recommend renting a car and taking a 1 1/2 hour drive from heathrow directly to the hotel, but I can't drive): if we went in a large group, we could hire a bus, and that would make travelling a lot faster and easier. Because right now the underground trip will take an hour, and the train would take another hour, and that's not counting waiting time. =

The host hotel (De Vere Shaw Ridge) is all booked up, so I have to look for another one. The nearest available one is 2.6miles= 4.2 km from de vere, and it's the Marsh Farm hotel, a 3 star thing that costs 278pounds=$770.50SGD for 4 nights. (2/5-6/5) A full english breakfast is included, though :D Checkout time is at 10am ): which means I have some time before a flight at around 6 pm.

The ticket for the fforde fiesta costs 30 pounds=$83.10SGD

So. The total cost of my trip would be $2524.30, not including the taxi from swindon train station to Marsh Farm, and meals. Actually, I can't believe the ticket itself is so pricey! I think it includes the price of booking of the conference halls, restaurant etc. And they're booked up the entire hotel from 3/5 to 5/5, so that must cost something. If I were to stay at the hotel, it would be 320pounds for 4 nights, more expensive than Marsh Farm. But I don't know how I'm going to get myself from Marsh Farm to De Vere, when it's 4.2km. I could take a taxi, but that would add up. I wish I could drive.

And in the above estimates, I'm not considering exact travel times, because they have to synchronise, right, if I'm booking a train ticket at a specific time. What if the flight gets delayed and I miss my train? >( the complications. And then I'm the kind who gets lost very easily. I'll even forget to say, have lunch if I have to travel during that period. (I do for certain, on 6/5) I think I need someone to come and chivvy me along.

some more pictures!
congrats to all the fd comp people :D

photos! and pictures say a thousand words, right? anyhow I couldn't bear to part with these baby socks because they are so effing cute, and yingling wanted me to take pictures too! I especially like the last pair because they were in this little plastic box and they were so adorable! Plus it doesn't mean the other presents are not as good as the pink booties, really. Today I received invaluable experience in reserving dinner XD even though eventually the reservations were cancelled. more tomorrow, since there's a queue for the computer. I hardly upload pictures!

Ah. the consequences of not checking your inbox for two days. It's supposed to be a luxury, not checking your inbox. Stupid chain mails. They make you think funny things. They make you read too much into things. I almost had an anxiety attack. My chest hurt and my stomach flip-flopped, and my heart cannonballed out of my chest. I am now dead, technically, since my heart escaped. Or did I have an out-of-body experience? Today my internal editor is sunbathing in Waikiki, hence the crap.

Let's see. My chest still hurts, and I am recovering quite slowly. I hate this week, because math assignments are due tomorrow and I'm still recovering from chinese new year bloatedness. I think I just wasted the long long weekend actually. Haven't been doing any good reading either, unless the vitamin c research counts. >( the surveys are also due on tuesday. Made a wee dent in them. At least they are of varied age groups. Okay let's look at the week ahead:

monday: math assignments due. math pt things to remember.
tuesday: RS. surveys due, arguments pending
wednesday: training things due. partly cloudy.
thursday: it's you-know-when, I don't need to be reminded. k thnx bye.
friday: the end is nigh!
saturday: not quite. FD comp :D

I think I'm just being pessimistic. After all, it's week 7, and the sooner we're done with the SAs, the better. Oh and I popped the blister sustained from walking around on wednesday successfully! (With sterile equipment, duh. Be safe. Use denatured alcohol.)

Guillermo Del Toro isn't directing Deathly Hallows!!!!!!!!!! *sniffs* *whines* *is positively whimpering* WHY DOES HE HAVE TO PUT THE HOBBIT BEFORE DH??? I mean he's doing something for the hobbit instead, in 2009, which coincides with deathly hallows filming in 2010, and so he can't do it. >( WHY does the hobbit have to have a pan's labyrinth slant and not deathly hallows? DH is so much darker, more emotional and complex than the hobbit. I mean not that they're comparable in terms of literary value, but the hobbit is so not worth guillermo.

havent been blogging in ages, but it's just that I've been busy with something else :D which is more satisfying than writing entries. okay for 15 whole minutes, just to make a post, I'm just going to type what comes into my head. and it starts now!

I don't know whether to go back to nanyang this year or not. I haven't been back since sec one (or two). I don't think the teachers remember me anyway. But it's just that these people from p6 2004 are going for a gathering and stuff. And on half days I always only make plans on the day before/ day itself, so things end up clashing or I end up not going anywhere, both of which are not very ideal situations. So this time I should make plans in advance. Here are my options: with yearmates, with chele/ nat/ geeru, or with the nanyang people, who probably include jingles, cat, laura and lyn if they're back by then, shihui, or anyone else who's in her circle. But it also depends if yearmates want to have a yearmeeting or not. I can't decide! pffbt I always have to decide. It's always fun with yearmates. With chele/ nat/ geeru, I get to moan about sweeney todd or DH. And if I go with jingles, I'll get to meet nanyang people. Jeez this sounds like I'm picking sides, for goodness sake. If anyone concerned reads this, please take the preferences with a pinch of salt. Hang on. more like an entire salt shaker. This is the very reason why people don't talk about things like this on their blogs. They talk about how their day went, which is a very safe and diplomatic topic.

have decided that blogging is worth my while again!

I felt like I was being stalked. Like a deer in the headlights, I didn't see it coming.



What I think of the Elections: [Energy and Environmental Issues]

So. The republicans that I've looked up are romney and huckabee. They both want to "reduce energy dependence", i.e., reduce US dependence on foreign oil such as in Iraq. However, there is only a slight mention of alternative technology on Huckabee's part, and none at all on romney's; he even suggests offshore oil rigs as one of the solutions to the energy problem. This is very disappointing, when both candidates are not making a commitment to reduce carbon emissions, especially since the united states has relatively high emission levels, compared to countries with higher population densities. It is absatively [anansi boys!] necessary that the US takes drastic measures to reduce their carbon emissions, or the lives of all the living things on this planet will be endangered. But. this doesn't come as a surprise since those funding republicans are companies in the oil and coal industry, so OF COURSE the candidates cannot suggest for greater steps to be taken against climate change, because funding for their campaign is more important.



On the democratic side, things seem a little more optimistic, but more about them in another post. By the way, I prefer obama to win the primaries, but mum prefers clinton, partly because she is within hilary's range of supporters. (middle-aged women who are for feminism)

today was an interesting day. I'm just a little upset.

ms S P 1 c c a wanted us to write an essay about ourselves. This is what I really felt like writing:
Nicole is a common name. (at least in rgs) But I am uncommon! *cue cringe* I am interesting! witty! insightful! nice! [this word is neutral and all-encompassing] I like reading graphic novels which are actually graphic and dark. I like musicals like chicago, spamalot, the producers, wicked, spring awakening, grease, west side story, phantom, and a chorus line. I read SF! I listen to ACDC, nirvana and led zeppelin. Does this mean I'm obscure, and clever? Of course it does! Does it mean I'm obsessive? Hell yeah. Oh and by the way, I have lousy social skills. So don't talk to me, if you haven't noticed already. Did I tell you I read slash? I'm a snarry shipper! I also like exploring the dumbledore/ grindelwald relationship.

Some Things I Wrote in December:
There it was, The Tree. A gnarled, old, oak tree standing starkly against a background of azure sky. The wizened man with skin that had weathered a hundred winters was shuffling-- the result of arthritic joints. He gave a tired sigh. The end was near, and he felt it in his heart. The old man's movements were methodological and achingly slow, his breath coming in short bursts and a light film of sweat forming on his callused palms. There was a staff in his right hand, with elaborate carvings that seemed to move if you looked at it. The bottom of the staff had a carving of a birth in winter, above it, a young boy, and towards the middle of the staff, the image of the old man without a beard and with smoother skin. Right at the top of the staff was a crystal sphere, its insides filled with cloudy mist, which was forming and reforming into words and pictures. The mist was gradually coalescing into an image of the tree, in its wrinkled splendour. The old man's knees were bluckling under his own weight, even though shadows of his ribs protruded from his chest, and loose skin gathered around his knees and elbows. The knees finally gave way, and he fell, to the ground, crawling the last couple of yards to the tree's roots.

What Have I Read Lately?

not many fics. um Are We There Yet by David Levithan. The latest artemis fowl book and I forgot what it's called - nat don't kill me! um. um. reading the ibsen plays now, for lit. Will probably be reading the collection of short stories next, the one that sihui says is horrible. Things don't look very optimistic, don't they? But will probably be going to the library tomorrow to return the book I found at the bottom of the book/paper pile on my desk. I might be stocking up, because of the 8-book allowance, but might wait till the 31st to take full advantage of it. XD and I don't think I can stop myself from reading newly-borrowed books when I'm supposed to be reading the lit things. BECAUSE it is vital that I read the lit books well beforehand so that I know what's going on in lessons. sheesh this sounds very unlike me but it is imperative that I get a reasonable gpa, after the mess of last year. It's difficult not to carry emotional baggage over though, even though I'm not supposed to.

I stood someone up the other day, and now I think that someone is standing me up to take revenge. Which is well-deserved.

My butt hurts from sitting on the worn seat. *shifts paradigm* I have internet access today, complete with skype! Can't wait for training on monday, haven't had one in a long time. :D happy. haha I'm getting less and less eloquent as the post goes on.

it's the first day of school! and a long time since I've last posted because mum still hasn't called up the internet people. Facebook is very addictive. School today was uninteresting. I have made a dent in marking! One more person till everyone has taken it. Can't wait for thursday afternoon. Looking forward to ugly betty at 8pm and 1am. Not looking forward to math next week. Looking at the mess the study has become.

See! I can be succinct if I want to.

p.s. I think there are more important things than blogging, even though I just want to say that Are We There Yet by David Levithan is fluffy, but not in a bad way.

hello(: this is my first post since I came to trinity but it's already the second last day of the programme. I guess its because I've had to much fun! no actually I only use the computer for msn, mugglenet, orson scott card, neil gaiman and freerice.com
I am so physically unfit! The last time I did any significant physical activity it was during tcamp, which was a month ago. I had rockclimbing this morning, and did... 2 and a half walls. My upper arms got tired really quickly, and so did my legs. meep. Will this mean I won't be able to do evac silver? Okay I shan't say this because yingling will get angry XD I think theory is okay-ish, and silver methods aren't as bad at bronze.
I miss yearmates! But I don't want to go home either. Because I like the lessons here, especially the creative writing, drama and sustainable future. Oh and the freedom to do whatever you want- I mean I am not made to do homework. I actually brought homework with me! And I did some okay... last week. I have to finish my tuition homework. And finish the library books that I brought along because they are due on the 18th. I left asimov's second foundation in a friend's room >( and she had to bring it back for me. WHY have I been so forgetful lately?! right there are other people looking over at my blogging, though by right I should not mind people looking over sine the whole world will be able to look when I'm done.

I live such a mundane experience. Am currently reading Mapping Human History by Steve Olson. It's taking me really long though >< style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">The realm of possibilities by David Levithan, which is love love love, and therefore I Love Levithan. Luscious, Lascivious, Lovely, Levithan. Go Read! and it's not just a gay book. It has glbt too, but THAT IS NOT THE POINT. THE POINT IS. GO READ LEVITHAN.

At school (again) because I needed some social interaction, besides talking to my sister, maid, parents, grandparents and grandaunts. I need to talk to someone my own age! Face to face. I didn't find the social interaction I craved, as I came outrageously, i.e. 1 hour, late. whoops. I mean the computer and telephone are wonderful technological marvels, but I need to see people. In the flesh. There aren't many people at school either, besides some juniors.

On another note, I'll be seeing a lot of people my age next week when I'm going for the trinity college summer programme thing. From 28/11- 16/12. So don't dial my home number, because I won't be there, and don't dial my handphone number unless you want to have long-distance bills. Messaging is okay, though(: as is email. I'm fairly sure I'll have internet access over there.

I. am. running out of things to say. If I miss youtube enough, I might go to the place in balestier tomorrow, pay $2, and check my email one last time. I hope there will be computers with internet in the airport, because I'll be spending an entire day travelling (12hrs) with nothing to do. My sister has kidnapped my mp3 player, and is hogging the nano, so I'll probably bring a cartload of books on the plane. I wishwishwish I had a kindle D:

decided to separate this from the kindle post because it would make that long and difficult to read.

right. oh more about tcamp, since you're swinging by: I think the last minute proposaling was very very worth it(: and the agonizing. [okay no more comment till later]

I am very proudly doing this on a school computer, because the internet at home got cut off :( the last time I had access to the internet was when I went to this internet cafe at balestier[sp?] shopping centre, which charged only $2 when I went for one and a half hours :D because the other place near city hall- something called stamford court- charges $3.50 an hour. You can't do gaming there though; not that they block it; but it's a house rule I think. haha does havencitystories count? Though admittedly it's getting boring. Why go to a cafe when you can go to school, you might ask. I can youtube to my content at the cafe, and I don't have to wear a uniform.

oh dear. I am sounding boring. Lately I've read-- A Haunted House by Charles Dickens, which was quite funny actually, but difficult to finish because of the language. Then I moved on to The Right Attitude To Rain by Alexander Mccall Smith, which started out longwinded and boring, but turned out to be quite a pleasurable read, and I'm glad chele recommended it to me.

I identify more with the protagonist, isabel dalhousie, a 38 year old philosopher, than with vicky austin, a teen, from the madeline l'engle books. This is very strange. Does it mean that I'm old?? Vicky Austin is someone that I would like to be, but she isn't a very realistic ideal of what I could be-- do you get that? Whereas Isabel Dalhousie is someone whose doubts I can identify with more. For a woman in her late thirties, you would expect her to be more sure of the decisions she makes, and of what she does, but she thinks life is filled with complexities and is sometimes insecure-- more like how I feel, actually. Because I'm writing this from the perspective of a young person, I still think most adults are confident, decisive people who know exactly what they want and what to do, so I don't expect isabel to behave like this. *rephrases* I am childish. Perhaps vicky is just not as emo as I am, even though the doubts she expresses are lesser than Dalhousie's in depth.

JEEZ I am not doing this properly. Right. Vicky is a thoughtful, precocious adolescent, and I should be thinking like her, but I don't. Isabel is a contemplative, almost dreamy middle-aged woman, but I think a lot like her. See? isn't that easier? No wonder I suck at english.

oooh I really have got to plug this: a kindle! it's this portable electronic reading device, that lets you store books, magazines, newspapers and rss feeds. (blogs) You download reading material from amazon.com, (paid for, of course) and then you can read it on your kindle, whenever and wherever you want! It's a great thing for people like geeru/ sydney/ crystal who can polish off books quite quickly, and you don't have to carry around a library of books just to keep yourself occupied. Say you're going on a long plane ride, or a holiday. It would be really easy just to download any book you wanted to catch up on, and read it on the kindle. You wouldn't have to limit the number of books you want to read to the number you can comfortably carry. It's like an ipod, just for books. And when you want to download more, or update your rss feeds, you don't have to connect it to your computer; it has this wireless system that doesn't depend on wi-fi called whispernet, which means you can get your updates wherever you are! [and even if you don't have working internet like me right now>( ]

the catch: it costs a whopping $400USD! Which converts to approximately $600SGD. *sigh* and it's not very pretty either :( Since you have to download and pay for every book you put on it, you have to own a credit card or have reasonable finances just to acquire a sizable amount of reading material. *awaits the day they make this work in libraries* You also can't whip out a book to share with a friend becauseall the books are stored in one device- unless they could make it infrared and you could send a book from one device to another...? Though people are worried about this infringing copyright laws.

ooh there's something very very important I have to announce to the world at large: I made vegan cookies! okay vegetarian because I'm not sure if the chocolate chips had milk solids or not. but still! I used melted olive oil margarine and soymilk :D and used isa's recipe from the post punk kitchen. (google it!) and they were good! right I think they're good because I made them XD but my yearmates ate them... and left 2 in the box. They were of a cake-y consistency and very soft, but very ugly, because the recipe said "drop" the batter on the cookie sheet but the batter was too gooey to drop, so I kind of squashed them on. Plus I wanted to make bigger, but fewer cookies to save time, so the cookies were very chunky and chocolate-chip laden. I used all-purpose flour instead of wholewheat, because the recipe said "oat flour" but I couldn't find that, until I realised that wholewheat was more or less the same thing. I can't wait to do something else! yumyum. I know chele had successful blueberry muffins (with fresh blueberries!) and andrea's banana chocolate cupcakes were really good... but I want to do something vegan, like vegan cupcakes.

right tcamp is over, and I suppose you'll be looking for something on that. I don't really want to say anything here (haha) because I don't want people to misunderstand things. But I enjoyed it a lot! Because the juniors really learnt stuff, and I learnt quite a bit myself. But if you check back later I might say more, after talking it over. (some more) >< but *** was a disaster *rants*

I might not update as often, because the internet at home isn't working and I'm at school now. but I still have to mark things at home, meep.

*sigh* we're going to get the progress reports tomorrow, and there's a nil chance of that school/ college place thing accepting me once they see it. I mean, even maddy gaiman, gets, I quote, an "impressive report card". I feel very inferior. This also means, as everyone knows, I have to work doubly hard in the holidays. (I always say this, don't I? scroll down for proof.) I found out lately that defeatist is a real word! oh dear.

I HATE the fact that I read so slowly. I mean geeru can read 2 terry prachetts a day. After school. Charisse read DH in 6 hours. I got it on saturday morning and was only sobbing on sunday night and finishing off the rest on monday morning, in time for sihui to borrow it. And take something quite recent-- Water for Elephants, by Sara Gruen-- I started this tuesday afternoon, and was only done wednesday afternoon. It's not even moderately thick! (although the font is small) I mean in primary school I used to be able to polish off books of this thickness in an afternoon, and now I take an entire day. >( I think I have selective memory, heh. I take so long to read because I pause in between for breaks to take my mind off reading and taking in information to think about the issues involved and how I feel about the book. I think I only finished Water for Elephants this quickly to return it to sydney so I can get what she calls "the gay book" from nat. Gosh I don't even think those two events are remotely related. *groans* That's another reason why I take so long-- I lose focus! I stop and think about something else while reading the paragraph at the same time and then I forget entirely what I've read in the time I got distracted, and I have to reread the paragraph. Actually this happens only when I read some books, like asimov, or the non-fiction bio things that crystal once recommended. But still! It happened during the class party today when I was trying to read wicked, and usually I keep my focus when I read fantasy books. But of course it IS kind of difficult to concentrate when nice music is in the background(:

(/random: I think wicked [the book] has more sex in it than necessary, and suspect gregory maguire did it just to keep it in the adult, not junior fiction section. *is evil because I've only read a couple chapters*)

Personal Statement

I would like to join the Trinity College Summer Schools because I wish to increase my knowledge of humanities and to hone my writing skills. Even though I take three science subjects, it would make me an all-rounded learner to enroll in the Creative Thinking Summer School. The writing, critical thinking and planning skills taught will not only help me in my humanities subjects, but also in subjects such as English, Biology and Chemistry. These skills are invaluable in life, and might prove to be useful in my tertiary education. I am especially interested in the “Learning for a Sustainable Future” subject of the Creative Thinking stream, as I believe climate change will most affect the youth of the future and its effects can only be countered by sustainable energy and also political power. Currently at school, the concept of environmental change is very rarely discussed in lessons, and student-initiated environmental projects manage to persuade only a fraction of the school population. It would be fascinating to think about the possibilities that would arise if we did or did not consider the effects of climate change at work, in school or at home.
This year I participated in a Current Affairs Competition as part of the Red Cross Youth, which is my extracurricular activity at school. The information I learnt in preparation for this competition would come in handy when I learn about the political aspect of the Creative Thinking Stream, as the competition was on disaster preparedness.
I am also very attracted to creative writing and literature, and these interests coincide with the electives offered in the programme. I hope, in the course of this programme, to make creative writing and literature more than just my interests, and for them to be part of the knowledge and skills essential for adult life.

go forth and multiply! [it] I really don't mind if you copy, because I wrote this in 15 mins, and it isn't meant to be award-winning, so. I am highly ashamed of myself because I was supposed to finish this yesterday and I'm only done with it after wasting time playing around on the internet. feel free to r&r.

Neverwhere review! (the bbc tv series)

Even though I've only watched a couple episodes from the first few episodes, I don't really like it. I think there's a dvd version of it somewhere, the cover of which neil gaiman was plugging, and I have a feeling he didn't really like the tv version. Even though I like neverwhere a lot, (hence the rereading) the tv version isn't very representative of the book. The user who posted it on youtube even said it was "short-lived".
Firstly, in the book Richard Mayhew is supposed to have a slight scottish accent, in the show it isn't just 'slight'; it's rather heavy, to the point where it sometimes becomes difficult to understand. Maybe it's just me, being not used to various british accents and all, but I think for the show to be accessible to a wider audience the actor playing Richard has to speak clearer.
I quite like the casting of Mr Croup, though, and his voice; he rolls his Rs! And is malevolent :D When I was reading the book I imagined croup and vandemar to sound like snape or morpheus (in the matrix, not sandman) and the guy play Mr. Croup sounds like that!
Though vandemar has the wrong clothes because he looks like someone from Law and Order, back in the 90s, with a white shirt and suspenders, of all things. Speaking of costumes, the Marquis has this cloak (okay) a white flappy shirt (okay) a glittery vest (passable) and khaki pants that look like ballet tights. First things first. Ballet tights are perfectly acceptable on dancers, and serve a functional purpose. But the Marquis doesn't dance, and so they do not have a functional purpose. [right. stupid argument.] I suppose the producers tried to go for the tudor tights-and-bloomers look, but it doesn't work out! I feel like the Marquis is going to do a grande jete any moment, and pirouette arrogantly around richard, who can neither dance nor act.
I think I'm quibbling. The tv series was first aired in 1996, and they had different fashion trends then (the person playing door wears biker boots) and probably different lighting trends then too. The lighting in the series looks over the top, with most of the croup/vandemar scenes in green, and angel islington scenes in red. Oh dear. maybe it's just the video quality. I wouldn't mind just listening to the audio part; it would do very well as an audiobook, thought that rather defeats the purpose of having a tv show.

I haven't been posting for a long time, and now I should be doing something else.

I suppose I should say where I went after the eoys, as everyone seems to be talking about that on their blogs. Nat, michele and I went to kino, yoshinoya, Wh, body shop, gramophone, and borders. There. Done. I said it.

That sounded unusually off-hand and arrogant. But I don't feel like recounting everything because it is tiresome. Lately I've been avoid all things that require physical exertion. I've also been sleeping a lot, moving slowly, and consuming vast amounts of junk, and therefore I am sloth-like. I'm spending half my time on the computer doing stupid things, looking for work to do, and putting it (the work) off. I should be getting my butt off the ground and doing my personal statement and corraling logs but no I'm currently made little or no progress on both of those things. I'm making myself more miserable as I write this. Miserable like wallowing-like-a-hippo miserable. Not that eoy results help, though.

I think I'm satisfied, but not happy with, bio, chem and chinese zuowen, but not much else. I don't think mum would be satisfied with anything, and there is a very high chance I would be retained. I should also spend my post-eoy time revising things, so I don't get too lost next year. I can't get lost next year because it's the last chance I'll get to shove/nudge/heave my gpa up. I think I said that at the beginning of this year too as well.

Ooh I’m using a mac and this is a neat font :D didot, I believe it’s called. Right now I’m supposed to be studying for bio so I’ll do the genetically modified food part now and then 10 year series and maybe math at home. Actually it would be more appropriate for me to do this on the class computer; it’s kind of impolite to do it here. I’m trying not to have to use the computer at home, because it usually ends up in me playing hcs or doing something just as counterproductive. Although right now is a good time to attack people on hcs, because most irritating players are having their exams now, i.e. the “fear me” people. So they’re terribly loaded and no one else is online to attack me, which makes it very convenient to… farm gold. As you can see, I’m pretty obsessed. And I shouldn’t be!

I think because I talk a lot about obscure [?} okay not obscure, it’s just that people in my school aren’t into these things. Right I have to finish my sentence. Relatively obscure books/ musicals/ movies etc, I come off as being geek. Wait no I think crying one’s eyes out for dobby’s death practically confers geek status. And sometimes people equate being geek to being hardworking… and I very sadly confess that I’m not. ): It’s kind of sad that a lot of people don’t read. Take for example, my sister. She refuses to read anything that I enjoyed as a kid and instead gravitates toward things like the princess diaries and other things in that genre. Though I’m being selfish here, because I cannot impose my choice of reading material onto my sister, because she likes biographies: think Chinese Cinderella, and I don’t.

I sound very horribly like someone else. I ALWAYS sound like someone else, without even trying >:( remember last year I said I subconsciously was writing like N.G., or maybe even charisse--now I’m writing the way someone talks. I don’t even have my own writing style! Or rather, blogging style. Some people say this happens most when you’re reading other people’s writing and come off sounding like the person you’re reading, just because you are so influenced by that person.
I don’t think I’ll have a conclusion today, or end it properly, because I didn’t write conclusions for lit and I feel kind of sad): I sound like a blue frog. Or the frog that is blue. It’s time to finish because I’ve reached the end of the page, what with the wide page borders. “So long, farewell, aufwiedersehn goodbye.” * cue music *

Someone is having a private-ish conversation in a not so private place. I will resist the temptation to earwig.

I don't know what to talk about. recently I don't know what's come over me. I don't think I'll pass physics. or math. or bio. oh dear. I shall have to be expelled, since the chances of me passing philo are kind of low too. And physics is the subject that many people pass. My gpa is out of sight already (the wrong way) and so now you can very clearly see I'm ranting. Everytime the eoys come around, I have this impending feeling of doom, but this time the feeling is so encompassing and it's worse than past years. But I think the best thing to do right now (so close to the exams) is to work really really hard, so today I will try not to fail lit tomorrow.

I was browsing through neil gaiman's blog, and it says he's with the bbc world service, recording anansi boys! I mean even though anansi boys wasn't his best novel, I am very much looking forward to listening to it :D Because it will be broadcast on the world service! i.e. in Singapore as well. Plus I hardly get the chance to listen to audio books; they're expensive and I don't have premium membership so I can't borrow them from the library. The use of excessive exclamation marks very clearly shows that I am excited; haha and plugging again. It says 17 november 07, so I'm marking that date on the calendar. ohoh and 17th nov is a saturday, so it most probably will the airing at around 4-5pm local time, because that's when they have BBC world drama on. So tune in to 88.9fm at 4pm on 17th november people, for anansi boys : )

I sound like an annoying tv ad.

hi :D oh and correction: harry cannot be compared to esther, primarily because one is female and the other male, and secondly, they both have wildly differeing personalities, so.

What would make for universal and interesting reading would be book reviews: I've read Foundation by Issac Asimov and I'm halfway through From the Dust Returned, by Ray Bradbury. And I've (only just -_-") discovered that From the Dust Returned is a novel version of the picture book, the Haunting. (which I talked about a few posts ago) They're due on friday though, so I think I'll return them and borrow them at a later date to finish. Plus there are ONLY 2 translated versions of the play Spring Awakening in the Reference Library (grr.) and that means I can't borrow them or anything, which also means I'll probably have to go there for a couple hours after the eoys to read it on the spot. I like the translated full-length plays! because the musical is kind of lacking in dialogue-- how much can you fit in 2-3 hours, what with all the songs and dramatic moritz monologues. But I'm just quibbling, because I wouldn't have liked it so much without the songs. The text plays explain a lot that is not said in the musical, and you get to analyse a bit, when you stare at the page for a while. Urgh I don't like fangirling on my own; you don't have anyone to argue with/ extol merits of various songs.

There's something very very pressing in my mind and I hate hate it and I want it to go away so I ignore it, but it refuses to wish itself off. It's not homework or anything academically-related, because those problems are MUCH easier to solve. (I did math filing yesterday!) Whining isn't a very good thing to do. I have also discovered that I am angsty, seeing from harry's characterisation in Underwater Light by maya. I should focus on the things most important (i.e. the eoys) and not on anemone problems, however prominent they are. Because! it is vital that I don't fail anything this time, or my gpa will be more screwed than it already is.

It's kind of quiet here, at not peak-ish hours. I like it when it's quiet because you don't have other people looking over your shoulder (actually this shouldn't matter because a blog is public anyway) or hovering over you, waiting to use the computer. I haven't been writing properly for ages, so maybe that's why my language is... somewhat different from what I was writing before. I'm using non-committal words! Which implies that I am non committal as well, which is NOT GOOD, and not what potential employers are looking for.

I feel so idealistic, thinking about employers and jobs. It's not like I'm going to be really efficient and send in my resume to everyone who doesn't ask for O levels, (quite a few, when I went to look) but it's just that I would like a WEP that I'm going to look for myself. You know what, if you knew me irl, you would know that I don't really mean what I said. No, scratch that. I mean what I say but I won't actually do it-- take the proposed potter party, for example. I have big stupid lofty ideas but not the exact plans to do them, you know. Which will ultimately be my downfall, though "The last enemy that shall be conquered is death." Okay that last quote was really random, and not very appropriate, but I just want to show off that I remember it. Haha that last statement was REALLY tactful. Tactful is the wrong word! but you kind of ish understand me, right?

This post is going nowhere, I just felt like blogging and I did it! Just like yingling, who feels like blogging every week or so, and does it. Only my posts aren't as enlightening or philosophical, and of course you know I fib a lot. Sometimes I think writing things down and recording things is very useful, because it helps me think through things slooowly, because when I think things out in my head I go from point A to B to F, and I skip a lot of things on the way as a result. I don't... think it thouroghly enough, or in depth, but I go very far in breadth, which resulted in comparing myself to wormtail, and harry to *cough*esther*cough*.

Today's post wasn't about anything in particular, and I am assured by the fact that orson scott card doesn't exactly keep on topic either, on the "Uncle Orson Reviews Everything" section on his website. Okay now a lot of the computers are occupied and I suppose I have to scram. Making the font size 6 prevents people from seeing what you are really doing, which is a great, but not foolproof thing for shared computers.

Actually I posted the last post on sept 7th, not monday sept 3rd--- I wrote the post on monday, switched the computer off, and thanks to blogger's amazing autosave, monday's post was saved and I didn't have to write an entirely new one on friday. (I think it was most likely really late thursday night)

anyway, people seem to be posting quite regularly, and I feel guilty. (that includes neil gaiman and Viva La Vegan) But! seeing as I never keep my promises, I don't think blogging more often will help. case in point: I promised to talk about endings and stuff in the last post, but after rigourous self-censorship, nothing has passed the test! Therefore there most likely won't be anything about things past, or maybe just a very little bit.
I can't believe I was in The Room today (for the very first time), and I just sat there, staring at everything, the floor even. I feel like such a naive idiot. This so clearly proves that I am a groupie, and that I overcomplicate things. Though most of the time talking things out helps (a lot!) and then you find you aren't the only one who frets. Thinking of it now, I think I should have seen the post coming. As in if one just uses his/her logic and powers of elimination, it kind-of-ish fits. I think yearmates expected it more that I did, although I must admit I was surprised (in a good way!) and had a slow reaction time.
Oh I remember now! I. am. so. wormtail. Think about the things we have in common! I swear I have mousey tendencies-- the voice, nose, personality. _watch for my betrayal, people._
Today is a space day. because I am writing in so incoherent sentences, I have no choice but to paragraph every sentence or two, because no two sentences connect. I mean, I don't think I am even thinking about the same thing when I start the sentence and end it. I was primarily inspired to blog today by yingling :D and one must have inspiration to blog! and so I did, and the rest is history! woot. as you can see, today I am merely crapping. The last paragraph was practically filler.
okay I must must fangirl about the producers! watch it on youtube! "Springtime for Hitler in Germany, winter in Poland and France!" "if you've got it, flaunt it" "we can do it" ooh yayness.

yay okay my keyboard works now :D turns out that the batteries I was using were the used ones -_-"

right. in relation to saturday, don't read what I said the wrong way-- I mean it in a good way. Okay not "good" but a positive way. Do you get what I mean? I think I should just not say anything out here because... everybody's been through it/ going to go through it sooner or later (it depends who you are) and the people whom I need to say things to don't have to resort to reading it here; not that I'll stop saying things here, just that [this is understood!] I'll self-censor more. And also because everyone else is more or less using their common sense, and only saying what needs to be said.

Let's talk about something interesting! i.e. my sniffles. Last thursday I had a sore throat. I hate that part of getting sick because you feel a lot of discomfort when you swallow and somehow it gets worse if the weather is warm. On friday it got really sunny and hot, so I got very warm but didn't sweat and felt feverish (and delirious) On friday night I was really considering not going for pop, heh. But I went! With more than a couple panadols. Being in a sniffy, clogged up, and head-in-the-clouds state does not do anything for your level of alertness= a really dense me. Today it didn't really get any better and I had to skip math clinic-- which I wish I wouldn't have skipped because my math gpa is practically at a sub-zero level.



Spring Awakening! I especially like [Left Behind]. It was sung at moritz's funeral, where moritz was an angst-ridden teen who committed suicide. Spring Awakening freely explores the timeless theme of teenage angst, showcasing reality in its most raw form. Adapted from a book written in 1891, it clearly shows that the tumultuous emotions that youth today feel are not just a product of media influences in the 21st century, but a product of truths one discovers along the road to self-discovery. oh, and its themes are similar to the ones in The Virgin Suicides, a book and movie which I reviewed last year.
It's currently on at the Eugene O'Neil theatre on Broadway, and has plans to start a US national tour in Fall 2008. The producers also have intentions of launching productions in London, Tel Aviv, Germany, Austria, Sydney, Spain, Japan, the Netherlands, and South Korea. The London and Sydney productions will open in 2008. So. for me to watch a live performance asap, I have to go to London or Sydney next year, or the US national tour. I've watched the entire thing already on myspacetv, but there is NOTHING like watching a musical live. rawr. maybe if I go to Sydney I'll go watch phantom too and see if anthony warhol is as good as cat extols. But it would be even better if it could go on an international tour and I could fangirl with people in person, instead of trying to squee with people living on the other side of the earth, and waiting an entire day for their responses because of the stupid time differences. I've been trying to get people to watch it on youtube/ myspacetv, but it hasn't been catching on. ): (probably because fangirling about musicals is such a geek thing to do.)


I think I'll talk about chalet and related things tomorrow because I need to ruminate, and do what sihui calls emo-ing.

I have something to say! Something revolutionary! Something which has never been disclosed to the public! Something to do with onions, dartboards, and meerkats!

Unfortunately, this is not the place to say it, and probably not mine to say. HAHA. *compares self with rita skeeter* Speaking of Skeeter, life would be a hell of a lot easier if I were as thick-skinned as she is. Then I wouldn't wallow, be poseur-goth or immature. For some reason a part of me thinks I just put the opening paragraph there to make people read this potentially long-winded post, because everyone knows deep inside what I am going to say anyway, and would believe it better if it came from the mouth of a different person.

sorry my keyboard died --i'm using the onscreen one--will continue with working keyboard

more than two weeks since I've last posted! I should do this more regularly. I think I promised a lot (book reviews, etc) haha so I suppose I have to pay my debts.

oh recently I've read The Illustrated Man by Ray Bradbury, and it's good! I mean I've never read ray bradbury before, despite the fact that many writers strongly recommend it. It's generally a collection of short stories in the SF genre, (squee!) written in the 1950s. It's interesting to see what people think would happen 50 years in the future, 50 years ago. I am kind of attached to fiction written/ set in the late 20th century, because it's sometimes kind of romantic [in the frankenstein way] and carries a sense of nostalgia. Things happened more slowly then, without the conveniences of the internet and mobile phones. Although I technically can't feel nostalgic about things that happened before the 90s because I wasn't born then, there is a greater sense of relation and identity than novels set in today's context.
And then I found out that Dave Mckean[sp?] did a collaboration with Ray Bradbury to illustrate The Homecoming, which got my stamp of approval(: Dave did lots of collaborations with Neil Gaiman in writing the Sandman series, the cover illustration for Coraline, the movie Mirrormask and the children's book, The Wolves in the Walls. The Homecoming is meant for children, yet is dark and beautifully haunting. The blurb goes so far as to call it whimsical; but I prefer to be cool and say it's gothic. XD (it does have gothic elements)

"And my junk is you" -Thea, from Spring Awakening

I would be lying if I said I wasn't emo after that. I am making this an issue! which is bad bad bad but I can't help it. I think some people are taking it very well. Yeah I agree with yingling in the sense that not everyone can be a good actor. (me included) Tomorrow is our first training without the ma'ams, and for some reason it has only sunk in now, partly because last week was kind of stressy, what with chem, math and all. I have a feeling it'll be kind of shaky at first but of course yearmates we can do it! Though it'll be weird not to see the ma'ams at training.

Outbursts are terribly inconvenient that they come at times when you most not want them to come, and when you will them to come it doesn't last very long. Usually I skim through blogposts (I wish I could do that with frankenstein) so hopefully other people will do the same. I don't want to overanalyse things because sometimes it can be emotionally tiring and provoke an unintended flood. Observe that all these sentences are not connected or even remotely linked; no wonder no one comes to drop by, but I'm not complaining- I like the benefits that come out of a not-so-promiscuous blog. No really I'm not being sarcastic-- it kind of means that I have the liberty to write more heh. As in say things I wouldn't normally say if it weren't more public. Although I should still be on my guard and know that something posted on the internet is accessible to anyone that wants to come and not leave a mark.

I think today I'm just posting for the sake of doing so; listening to mugglecast's second book 7 discussion (!) and pottercast's first discussion as well. I can't get enough of discussion! because people in school are kind of tired of it/ getting tired of my fangirling XD / have too much work on their plate (I should do something about my mountain of work actually) I like amy winehouse by the way, she has an amazing voice and a old-school style not unlike nat king cole (she's influenced by tony bennett, who sounds like nat king cole) and isn't afraid to not sound like other artistes her age.

It's been a long time-- 12 days! since the last post. I have so many things to talk about. but probably I'll end up talking about none of them and doing a dumpy plugging post on the latest book/ movie [insert pop culture offering] I haven't been posting lately because of cac and the stupid last minute things; most of the time I spent on the computer was on chempt/ editing other people's things/ my things.

Firstly, a press release! not that it would need one, of course. More like an official statement. Because when something happens I go blogsurfing to see what other people thought, you know. So, I'm of course disappointed and I'm really sorry to let all of you down. I know I should have done better; should have worked earlier, made eye contact, but what's done is done, and I'm trying to do a post mortem of it all. (like what some people did; trying to stare down the poster and someone's comics XD) but yeah it's important to do it when things are fresh. I feel kind of liberated, actually, and after wallowing a little it's not so bad. And don't blame yourself when it isn't really your fault. (I'm talking to you, not myself XD)
On a lighter note, I got to say hi to some people! and scope out the standards; things we're up against; also had some experience with my self-discipline (or lack thereof) and persuasive editing. also... human relations haha. and learnt from the juniors as well. I don't think this will have any significance, though, but someone links me, so. I mean if you want more specifically feel free to comment/ tag /email :D
Plus I got to know people better through it all; thanks to everyone for supporting and helping in any way(:

today I will be filling this space with... rambly things!
I think our year should spread the load a little? Actually yeah we've tried to do that already- but based on our numbers I think the load will be easier. Although due to my position what I'm saying or whatever I put here, won't relatively have much weight. Honestly that also leaves for less self- censorship but of course I should be mindful on what I put here because anyone can read it. Today I went rather dr phil on some people, reading too much into what is to come and I think I dug a little too deep into the emotional black hole. This comes from being hypersensitive and reading too much Frankenstein, where shelly gets exhaustingly poetic, and where victor can rant emo-ly for almost one chapter... but I digress. We have vowed to improve relationships with the jellybeans and I hope that will go well because it is vital to have trust on both sides and not witch.

okay the spicegirls!


OotP review continued! right lets skip skip skip to the part right at the end- you know when harry asks luna about sirius? and when luna is putting up lost notices? and then luna says something along the lines of- "things you have lost may turn up when you least expect them" ( I forgot the exact quote) but she was saying that as a metaphor to her lost shoes/items but also as a reference to sirius, because harry was, at that point, highly distraught about his death. But but at the end of the 5th book it doesn't play out that way, with luna saying that they (her mother and sirius) were just hidden behind the veil, with an implication that they would return. In both scenes, there are ideas that sirius is still alive in some form, although coming back as the form of a ghost would be highly unlikely, when we see harry talking to nearly headless nick at the end of book 5. In the movie, though, the implication that sirius would return is more certain, possibly to enlighten movie-goers who haven't read the books, but also, could it be a subtle hint as to which character gets a reprieve in book 7? Because if they put this teaser scene in the end, might it be significant in later books/movies? (Pirates of the Caribbean 3, anyone?)

Oh and in the scene where sirius dies, do you remember bellatrix saying 'avada kedavra' and then sirius falls over? If you didn't know what avada kedavra meant (i.e. the unenlightened movie-goer) you wouldn't have known sirius was about to die or have understood the gravity of the situation, but probably when harry starts to yell hysterically you know. But in the time frame between sirius getting hit by the curse and harry yelling, you think sirius was just hit by a normal spell that is reversible, because in movies, (especially fantasy children ones), everything becomes right in the end. I think this is very good for people, because it then encourages them to read the book :D and be enlightened.

I was also quite mad when they didn't blow up the huge ministry of magic statue. After they spent so long doing a pan of it when harry goes for his hearing, you might have thought it would become significant later in the movie, but noooo the blowing up doesn't happen, only the glass tiles shatter and harry gets covered in dust- not as dramatic as I had hoped. I mean the statue is symbolic of racial equality in the books, because the magical beings are all looking adoringly at the wizard in the middle, because some wizards think they are better-off than half-bloods. This would add so much more depth and significance to the movie as this prejudice mirrors the prejudice we have today, and is, in a way, a political comment. *end review*

p.s. please don't spoil me before the 21st!

I watched it!!! though spoilers abound so I'll make it highlightable below, but because I have these irritating blue curly things I have to bump the review down so that people who haven't watched it don't spoil themselves by accident. In the meantime, I'll entertain you with some moderately emo stuff.

cac is in two weeks! *panics* we have made... moderate, though very slow, progress. We've done the content to put on the poster, but not the poster itself. The poster is the most most important thing because if we don't have anything to show for our efforts, they won't have anything to mark. I mean if you look at the fa people, they're (kind of) worried and they're 5 weeks away from the real thing, but obviously it's different skills they're working on and it's a different kind of panic but still I think I should have greater progress. haha I'm being obnoxious, not mentioning yingling and khaingzin but they're yeah working hard as well. (this sounds like an afterthought) and we've heard a little from other schools too.

Review!! *Spoiler Alert* yeah I watched it :DD haha repetition for emphasis. I likedliked what David Yates (the director) did with the opening scene; it was so big picture and different from other opening scenes and artsy (a little) and epic;- remember harry playing with his wand under the covers? (okay that sounds wrong) But yeah it was macro to micro when previously it was micro to macro.
The dementor thing was good(: and harry's surprise that mrs figg was a squib was played out fairly well. BUT I was kind of miffed they didn't put dumbledore's howler to petunia in it, though it couldn't have taken more than 3 mins [?] or so to develop that plotline and the connection, because it is so vital that the movie-goer realises that petunia isn't as ignorant or one-sided as she seems. Rawr. I mean if they really didn't have time, they could take away the small "harry being emo" part on the hogwarts express which is so useless. As in we already know harry is angsty and mad and all, you don't have to emphasise it so much; and harry isn't the only one being frustrated either- look at ron and hermione. *end of spoiler*
It's getting late, will probably post more later. (I usually don't keep this promise)

I've been reading The Curious Incident of the WMD In Iraq, and it's a parody of Mark Haddon's A Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time. It's like the british version of the farenheit 9/11 reader, featuring tony blair. It's a much more enjoyable and easier read than the Farenheit 9/11 reader, with the book structured like a novel, with a rising action, conflict, climax and all. (though it might seem a far stretch to some) I also like the humor in the book, which is british-y and mostly centres on the assumption that tony blair is stupid. (like christopher in A Curious Incident) So actually the jokes aren't that witty, but the author references a lot of songs, not all which I know about.

I went to look for this song that tony was supposed to have listened to in his youth- he was in a band- it's called Smoke on the Water by Deep Purple. It's very old-school, the kind of rock featured in the School of Rock, and mr m izar played the guitar bit on the last day of school last year. haha 210 people might/might not remember this. We also sat in a circle and sang avril lavinge and backstreet boys, if that jogs your memory. (how embarrassing for me to mention all this) /end digression.

It's been some time since I last posted. I mean I didn't even notice a month passed. I suppose that's because I've been rather apathetic these few days. Today I went home with nothing to do, since I quit german (my grades, duh) and I was/ am feeling bored. Even though technically I'm supposed to spend this time getting my grades up, and being on top, but how much more on top can you get? Not that I'm really on top but I think when I had things on I had more motivation to do homework, and now it's like- can I have something to do? Actually I should really pick up tips from felicia and mug, say chinese, over twice or something. That would really make a difference. Actually though really the point is for me to plan my afternoons properly, now I've got all this spare time, because a lot of times I find myself thinking of what to do next.

I have nothing to talk about, because I have blocked all thoughts from permeating and distracting me. Usually when I have nothing to do I burst into "What is this Feeling?" out of tune, and irritate cat, who's sitting beside me, or whoever happens to be around me at that time. I like wicked and it's songs- I've almost got the lyrics down pat. Though my initial thoughts right after I saw it were that wicked was very... shallow, and its plot was weak in some places, and was a tad cliched. But of course I was converted by nat, crystal and chanel, who were squealing all about it right after and who can resist fangirling?! Although deep down I still feel wicked has a larger fanbase than phantom purely becase it is more accessible and american. [elitist!] Though when you think carefully, most musicals don't have a lot of depth. (how much depth can you fit in 3 hours?) They have great songs though, and dancing. I read the programme (yes I have it! squee) and it says the dancing in wicked was choreographed by a tap person. They weren't as technical as compared to phantom, or say, chicago, but very showy and dramatic. I mean very appropriate for wicked, what with green elphaba and all. And its props are the best of all the theater things I've seen, with the gears and trapdoor and the part in "Defying Gravity" where elphaba is raised by a harness. Before watching wicked I thought it was a rather low-profile musical (a huge understatement!) and nothing to yell about but "I have been changed for good!" ohoh and Oliver Tompsett is a much better Fiyero than Adam Garcia (who was incidentally in Cyote Ugly), as seen from the vids on youtube. Though I was sad that I didn't get to see Kerry Ellis as Elphaba ):

ohoh I can compare this for english but I am spending too much time on the computer, and might post later/ in a long time

HI. you must thank oh great cat for motivating me to blog. XD because I was saying she wasn't updating, and then she said I don't update very often myself. (yeah you might notice I never usually do successive posts.)

I want want want to watch hellboy 2!!!! *fangirls* Guillermo del Toro and Guillermo Navarro are working on it, and they worked on pan's labyrinth! (which is rated >:( but I watched on the flight to wales :D) I mean I've seen shots of the set on neilgaiman's blog, and the style/ makeup is so much like the faun in pan's labyrinth! And I loved the cinematography and art on pan's labyrinth, so I'm kind of expecting something similar in hellboy 2. Even though it's rated, you MUST go watch it by whatever means possible, because the story is so invoking, and yet has gothic features, plus the emotion of Ivana Baquero, who plays the protagonist is so real and tangible that I was so moved and almost cried, only mrs [P] rama was having her breakfast right beside me. I know pan's labyrinth is so last year, but it's still good and won 3 academy awards anyway, and therefore is definitely worth watching.

I envy maddie, neilgaiman's daughter: she gets to go to premires, visit sets, get previews of whatever he's writing, and maybe is even his muse! (as seen in the afterword of one of the sandmans) she's guest blogger now, and is so cute and funny- I hope she gets to write when she gets older; she's only 13 this year and incredibly lucky.

hi uh because I haven't updated for at least a week plus now, I suppose I have a duty to post, like when I set up his blog, I had the responsibility to post. osc says family first so uh you had the kid, you are primarily the kid's parent above everything else and you have a responsibility to your child. The above analogies are not interchangeable by the way, I mean, if you happened to be thinking so. I just put it down because I happened to think of it and now I really think that this is the worst way to start a blogpost but an absolute space-filler.

I am back from camp! Which was fun and made me think a lot. I mean a whole lot. And I went home and thought and thought and thought until dinner and didn't write anything down. -.-' I mean when you think you tend to think of things that relate to each other right, so say you think of school you think of homework and the next thing you know you are thinking of... something entirely unrelated. And I am a person that gets distracted easily, so I didn't really reflect on depth but breadth, which is not my objective at all. I am trying to think of more important things and give not so important things (relatively) like the bombshell that dropped (from heaven/hell I don't know) less attention. I am very appreciative and greatful for the fact that the ma'ams made the effort to make it fufilling for all of us, so thank you :D But the most important thing is to keep it going, and not let go/ forget/ give up halfway there, if you know what I mean. But being a terribly idealistic poetic person, some more sensible and down to earth people might think otherwise, and I will not fault you for making an incredibly sane opinion.

This is just to rant, so smart people will skip this paragraph and go straight to the next one, which is of a more pleasurable nature. BAH I absolutely have to make myself get a better gpa next semester or I will be skinned alive by the teachers, my tuition teachers or my mother, whoever sees me first. Of course the ideal solution is to lock myself in a room so that no one sees me, but then I would run out of things to read or surfaces to scrawl on, and will perish silently. I have so many things to doooo. and deadlines to meet and people to make happy, though I realise I really have nothing to complain about when I see other people, so I should sit quietly and finish whatever I have to do so I can watch ootp and read deathly hallows without guilt, and without wallowing like a fat hippo in the mudpool of self-pity.

oh wales. Things I thought about away from the computer.

Mr l c p: mind the gap! (neverwhere reference)
crystal/me: squee!
mr L: good omens!
crystal/me: double squee!
nat: *rolls eyes*
Mr L: klingon!!
someone: my dad watched star trek.
Mr L: naruto!
chanel: *screams* (she ships Mr L/ DS by the way, both bio teachers with initials)

Ms t b c: Aren't you glad we watched wicked instead of avenue q or equus?
me: (in a presumably low voice, muttering) BUTbut equus is!! (you actually considered equus?! and failed to choose it?!)
Ms T: yes, nicole?
charisse: *giggles* YES nicole?
me: um yeah uh wicked was good. definitely. [BUT not as good as equus could have been!]

The above is... clique-ish, geeky, and cheese.

Being at home is really getting to me. After two whole weeks of being surrounded by tons of people, staying at home alone with no one to talk to is VERY boring. Actually, I should get a move on with my work, since after this week, I'm not going to be very free. You know when you really have nothing to do when you start planning your day around what is on tv- there's CSI today :D
I kind of miss big brother on uk tv- it practically showed every day, and people followed it fairly closely, judging by the amount of coverage it received by trashy newspapers. I have also very sadly found out that I had spent only half of the money I brought, and could have bought more stuff >:( like um the gap shoes! or the primark things that were so incredibly cheap: 2 pounds for a pair of sunglasses, 7 for shoes- about $6 and $21 respectively. I shouldn't be judging the worth of my trip by the amount of things I bought though, but by the experiences I had. And sometimes I feel I spent my time thinking about the wrong things, and so I remember those things, but not the valuable bits. For example, in dalefort, I was mulling over stupid stupid witching (what do you get when you put 39 hormonal females together 24/7? much like big brother, in a way.) and making them into issues of loyalty and assertiveness - but what are the chances of working with these people again anyway? And the teachers could see quite plainly through our petty rivalries and very sensibly not make it an issue. I suppose these things happen quite often on overseas trips and to not carry it over to school life is a smart thing to do.

I'm back! (and missing wales LOADS)

Chanel very nicely sent me the wicked soundtrack and I want very much to start listening to it now but my sister has the radio turned up ): I have the uncontrollable urge to sing along!! "No one mourns the wicked..." "Loathing, unadulterated Loathing" and then very soon the fangirl squeals will start. I MISS FANGIRLING, something we weren't short of on the trip. Though we mostly stuck to our cliques during the fieldtrip, we still got to know each other to some extent.
I absolutely hate singaporean weather. When I came back, it was so incredibly humid and warm- 30 degrees, imagine! I wouldn't have minded trading windsor weather for muggy tropical afternoons, although the warmth is condusive for growth- it turns out we have a much greater variety of species in mangroves than on the welsh saltmarshes.
Back to fangirling, in london especially, we talked about good omens and neverwhere- "mind the gap" and fed ducks in hyde park (not st. james', sadly) And I bet you never knew mr l i m cp liked neil gaiman. (but him liking star trek isn't that surprising)

now that it's over, I have math, english, and chinese pt waiting, not forgetting c a c things D: But I have a nat king cole tape to keep me sane and nostalgic. though I technically am too young to be nostalgic about the 1960s.

first things first: JORDIN WON! Finally, an american idol I am satisfied with. (although I think doolittle shouldn't have been voted out) I knew during career ed (a free block), an hour after the show was over :D because wencen was nice and went to find out when physics pt-ing. I liked blake when he did the maroon 5 thing though, partly because I like that song so much and I liked to see it not mangled. In my personal opinion, the guys were not as good as the girls this time, because I was gunning for stephanie or geena to get into the finals, but not phil or sanjaya to get so far. OSC doesn't like the whole idea of american idol though :/ he thinks it is a very commercial thing and the contestant with gimmicks and is popular gets to win, but not the contestant with the best voice. He also didn't like what the record companies did with mcphee's album because they made it sound very pop-ish, copying from artistes with the highest record sales, resulting in her not sounding anything like herself on american idol. -think 'somewhere over the rainbow'

secondly, my mum and sister just left for my sister's school trip, which reminded me to pack early (i.e. today/tomorrow) for wales because they found out at the last minute that the luggage couldn't close properly and had to switch their stuff to a new one. I will miss them, because my sister isn't coming back for 12 days and I won't see them until after wales. They left at 10.40, and they were supposed to be at the airport at 11, which also reminds me not to pack last-minute and make sure everything is ready, which I very rarely do X) but if I don't the consequences will be mine (and a lot of other peoples') to bear, so.

Trying trying very hard to be focused and work on physics so that it can pull the unsatisfactory mya mark up. Will probably post tomorrow so that I have a lot for you to chew on as I won't be posting very much when I'm in wales- we only have internet connection for the first 6-7 days I think, so maybe I can post then.

Osc: If you're a Harry Potter fanatic -- and what sensible reader isn't? -- you might enjoy The Great Snape Debate, a book that can only be purchased at Borders.

I'm going to buy that asap, and I am very happy that osc supports jo. :D :D all the more you should like harry potter.

Today I will plug plug plug since my life is kind of dumpy right now, and not very interesting.

I ship bean/petra!=pean?[ew.] or betra [odd.] it is so incredibly sweet, and a lot like the canon pairing harry/ginny. Though I think not many osc fans ship pairings because the books are quite plot-based, and one tends to focus on the themes and major issues at hand. And bean/petra have weathered many hardships together and they are the only people that genuinely understand each other, just like in Kathy/Tommy in Never let Me Go. (you should read that) Sometimes I find it surprising that osc can write fairly good fluff, since most of the Worthing Saga was smut, and the fact that he is a guy. (okay I'm stereotyping) So I'm kind of on Shadow Puppets right now, after a short break from osc because his stuff are quite intense and sometimes emotional, and after reading one, you feel a little drained and in great awe-- this 'whoa' sense like after you've been though a 360 degree roller coaster.

= I am very happy that blogger automatically saves posts now, so that my long lovely posts don't get accidentally deleted.=

I read in Two Caravans that chickens are bred in masses, and they are housed in a large warehouse-type thing (illegal, of course, but cheaper for major supermarkets) the lights are turned on 24/7 so they don't sleep and continue feeding all the time, making them nice and plump for human consumption. The food they have is nutrition-rich, making them weigh more and sell for a higher price. In the crowded space they are in, they are packed shoulder to shoulder, such that they can only waddle a little and shove their way to the feeding tubes. As a result, they have little or no physical exercise and underdeveloped muscles, with brittle bones. This makes them all the more easier to catch them and stuff them, sometimes on top of each other, into crates for transportation. Feeding on large quantities of food results in them producing great amounts of excrement. Because they are packed so tightly within these warehouses, the excrement forms a layer on the floor, and the birds have to wade through it as when one cleans the warehouse, one has to first remove all the chickens. During their short lifespan of five weeks, they live in these unsanitary conditions but do not fall ill because of medicines in their food supply.
One can only imagine how other livestock are treated, just to supply the needs of human demand and excessive consumption. The fishing industry is also not spared because most companies fish from unsustainable sources, and the fish are killed at increasingly younger ages to meet worldwide demand. Their short lifespans only allow them to grow to a certain weight before they are harvested. These are one of the reasons I chose to go veggie, and perhaps you should consider changing your diet to save your environment. Having one less meat product every week may not seem much to you, but if done on a large scale, the demand for animal products may eventually decrease and the overwhelming amounts of natural resources used to sustain these industries may decrease as well. For more information, go to The PB&J Campaign.

its been what, three weeks? an mya hiatus, even though I've been spending lots of time online anyway. I did really badly ): rawr though it was expected due to my lack of effort. I haven't told my parents yet, though I plan to do so today, to get it over and done with. I think my mum would ground me for the rest of my life, till I'm thirty. This is exaggerating but I think she doesn't really expect this, explaining the serious punishment. I sound/feel kind of apathetic about the news though, I think mainly because it has happened so many times, and if I start to bawl over it, it wouldn't help because it would make me feel in more of a funk, and less motivated to start working again. (what mum would get me to do when she knows) Anyway, I did my cranky blubbering yesterday already, perhaps on a subconcious hunch that my results would be so bad. I saw a lot of people blubbering today and I distract myself by going to study german or reading my caravan book, primarily because I've been rather touchy lately and hypersensitive, i.e. prone to psyching myself into thinking blubbering would make me feel which I'm trying to correct. (I have no idea how)

On a lighter note, I've read three sandman graphic novels, Never Let Me Go or Alles, was wir geben mussten (translated, it means 'we must give everything'), Shadow of the Hegemon and In the Time of the Butterflies. I think I won't review the sandman ones, because I can't remember enough to review it >< but I especially liked a midsummer night's dream's neil gaiman's puck in dream country, I think, the one with the trio of short stories